Bristol Palin, Poster Child for Abstinence?

What a week for wackiness! Let’s see now, there’s the assault on ads for erectile dysfunction, Carrie Prejean’s semi nude photos, Elizabeth Edwards’ tell all book (The Oprah exclusive is later today), and now, Bristol Palin.

Bristol Palin? That’s right. Hot on the heels of her public spat with Baby Daddy Levi Johnston comes word that America’s best known teen mom is becoming a spokesperson herself.

abstinence

When we last heard about Bristol, her mom, the Governor of Alaska was issuing statements on her behalf savaging Johnston for his series of public appearances airing dirty laundry. And remember, these were the same kids who were totally off limits in terms of media coverage during the last presidential campaign.

How quickly things change.

And for what? ABSTINENCE! Which is kind of like shutting the barn door after the horse has escaped and run in the Kentucky Derby. Young Ms. Palin is preaching abstinence for the Candie’s Foundation. Candie’s is a line of teen fashions that some argue makes young girls look like tarts. It’s interesting that while Bristol Palin speaks for the foundation, the spokesperson for the Candie’s brand is none other than Britney Spears.

So anyway, Bristol goes on “Good Morning America” and says “I just want to go out there and promote abstinence and say this is the safest choice.” How profound. Of course, that’s not what Levi Johnston believes. He says, in that deadpan style of his that it won’t work. It certainly didn’t when it came to the two of them.

So this is the latest front in the culture wars. A teen mom espousing waiting until marriage for a company that puts out hot to trot fashions. A 20 year old breast augmented beauty queen who once posed semi naked preaching the virtues of “traditional” marriage. A wronged woman putting out a book that only makes people wonder what she was thinking in not stopping her philandering husband from running for president.

If I didn’t know better, I’d think the economy has suddenly rebounded, the Taliban has been defeated, and the Israeli-Palestinian conflict has been peacefully resolved. But hey, we don’t want to know about any of that. Check Oprah’s ratings when today’s show is done if you don’t believe me. The culture war has been fought, and we lost.

Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe some teenage girl or girls, when it comes time to make the decision about whether or not to have sex will think of Bristol Palin and tell their heavy-breathing boyfriends no!

Britney???

That is the point, isn’t it?

Or is it?

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